


I Love You Far Too Much

by orphan_account



Category: The Creatures (Youtube RPF)
Genre: Angst, M/M, my favourite
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-18
Updated: 2015-10-18
Packaged: 2018-04-26 22:06:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5022271
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kevin starts dating someone new, and Aleks isn't exactly okay with it, or over him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Love You Far Too Much

‘ _**Kevin McFarlane** is in a relationship with **Xxxx Xxxxx**._ ’

Aleks stared blankly at his phone screen, his eyes focused on the words on his screen. At first, he had just scrolled by the message, until it registered in his mind that the words ‘Kevin’ and ‘relationship’ had been in the same sentence.

He hadn’t seen that since his was the second name in the sentence.

Aleks’ thumb hovered over the strange name for a moment before he tapped on it. He stayed there for some amount of time, he couldn’t say how long, just hunched over his phone, elbows rested on his knees, staring at the screen, looking at post after post, picture after picture.

The one that hurt the most probably wasn’t even the picture of them and Kevin kissing. It was of Kevin asleep in their lap, his hair being played with as he slept. The fingers of Aleks’ free hand twitched, and he let go of his phone as it died, watching it bounce off the carpet, hitting his foot.

Aleks’ eyes moved to his thumb, and he slowly closed his hand, opening it again. It had cramped up from holding his phone and scrolling for so long, yet he hadn’t realised, instead fixated on figuring out how and why Kevin had ended up with someone else.

Aleks slowly pushed himself up, rolling his shoulders back, ignoring how they ached, instead wrapped up in the numbness of his thoughts. It was like a giant cloud had decided to encompass his brain. Full thoughts couldn’t form, and he felt like he was shutting down.

He began walking towards his bedroom, his fingers brushing against the wall, searching for the light switch as if the room was a strange place to him. His fingers finally hit the switch, eyes narrowing in on a simple photo strip on the wall above his bed. His feet led him to the bed, and he stood on top of it, looking at the photobooth pictures like he’d never seen them before.

It was from when he and Kevin had gone to see a movie together, which had ended up being their first date. Technically, it was more like their third or fourth, but neither of them had ever called the times where they had hung out and ended up kissing dates until then.

Kevin had insisted on the photobooth pictures, shoving Aleks into the somewhat cramped booth in the mall while they had waited for their movie to begin. Aleks had fed the five dollars into the machine as Kevin squished himself in next to Aleks in the seat clearly not meant for two grown men, one of whom was far taller than most people.

The first picture was just the two of them sitting there, arms thrown around each other’s shoulders so they fit in frame better, Kevin squishing Aleks’ cheeks with his hands so that he was making a ridiculous face, laughing at him. Aleks had dealt with it, planning to do the same to Kevin on the next picture.

However, the next picture was why he never got around to it. Instead of letting go, Kevin had turned Aleks’ face towards his and kissed him instead. Aleks dimly remembered the feeling of Kevin’s lips against his as the shutter sound played, feeling like it had been eons ago instead of the approximate year and a half.

The third picture portrayed Aleks with his hands covering his face, what little visible of his cheeks stained pink. Kevin had been laughing, his forehead pressed into Aleks’ shoulder. Aleks had whacked his shoulder between this and the next picture, and Kevin had later complained that Aleks had hit him too hard and so he deserved ice cream as consolation for his injury. Aleks had told him to shut the fuck up and get into the car because it was dark outside and he was hungry.

The very final picture on the strip was the moment after Aleks had smacked Kevin. Kevin had looked up to express his annoyance at Aleks’ treatment of his shoulder, but instead, Aleks had taken Kevin’s face in his hands and kissed him, effectively shutting him up before he had even spoken.

The machine had printed two sets of the pictures, Aleks and Kevin each taking one, both careful not to lose it before they’d gotten home. Aleks’ had immediately gone above his headboard, and he hadn’t moved it since.

In fact, he’d never even thought about taking it down, not even when his and Kevin’s relationship had crashed and burned, going out like a forest fire, leaving them both as destroyed as the trees.

Aleks’ fingers reached out, and he lifted the corner up, the tape breaking the silence of the room as it pulled away from the wall. His head was swimming as his eyes roamed over the pictures again, replacing his face in all the pictures with the ones of Kevin’s new significant other, finding it far too easy.

He pushed the strip back against the wall, smoothing out the tape again. The wall was cleaner underneath than around it, and he’d rather not be reminded of why without being able to still see the memories.

Aleks sat down on the bed, rubbing his hands on his blankets. He slowly laid down, painfully aware of how cold he was, how there was no human version of a space heater lounged out across him like a starfish, or half asleep on his one side, talking about absolutely nothing in the most entrancing way.

Aleks wiggled under the blanket, closing his eyes. He wasn’t aware of what time it was, only that it was late and that he was glad his phone was dead so he couldn’t check or call Kevin. If it wasn’t, he’d probably be saying something on Kevin’s voicemail that shouldn’t be leaving his mouth.

He’d probably compare Kevin’s new relationship to theirs.

Ask if Kevin was going to wake up at three in the morning to say “I love you” and go back to sleep because he forgot to before he passed out.

If Kevin would write disgustingly sweet things on Post-It notes and leave them scattered around the house to find.

If Kevin would change their name in his phone to a silly pet name that they put up with only for him.

If Kevin would kiss them even when they were sick, because “We’ve showered together, why not sneeze together?” and only regret it when he was throwing up later on.

Mostly, Aleks wanted to ask about the photobooth pictures.

Did Kevin still have them?

Did he throw them away?

Did he burn them?

Did he shred them, were they still glued to his wall?

Did Kevin leave them there for too long?

Did he rip them off the first time he and Aleks had seriously fought in the last few tumultuous weeks of their relationship?

The relationship that had ended when a door had slammed and a picture of them fell off a wall and shattered, neither moving to clean it up. They’d just stared at it like it meant something, and then Kevin had left.

He didn’t come back after that.

Aleks was left to clean up the glass, to throw out the frame, to stuff the picture into a drawer full of others that he refused to look at. For the most part, he was able to ignore Kevin had been in his life at all, if he avoided thinking too long, or going onto the internet, or opening his eyes.

Somewhere, Aleks was sure he was happy for Kevin, but mostly he felt empty and a bit sad. And a lot tired.

He pulled his pillow over his head, rolling over onto his side, squeezing his eyes shut harder, willing himself to go to sleep.

Yet, even once he did finally fall asleep, Kevin ran rampant through his thoughts, memories replaying in his subconscious, the good mixing with the bad so that it went from Kevin’s first “I love you,” to his first “I hate you.”

Aleks woke up feeling tired than he had when he went to sleep, and when he had finally dragged himself out of bed to retrieve his phone, daylight was half gone.

But when the screen of his phone turned back on, he regretted leaving bed to get it in the first place as the first notification popped up on his screen.

‘ _ **@GoldenBlackHawk:** Here’s to two months of the best relationship I’ve had the chance to be a part of. I love youu_ ’

Aleks stared at his phone for a moment before tossing it aside, curling up in bed again. Even if it was followed up by “I hate you” half the time, at least he could still hear Kevin say “I love you” in his dreams. And that was far preferable to this reality of not being able to hear it directed at him from Kevin’s lips in real life.

Because even replaying “I hate you” over and over in his head felt more loving than reading “I love you” when it wasn’t him that Kevin loved anymore.

 


End file.
